OMG It Worked! – Mark Zuckerberg Gives Away Facebook Fortune

Mark Zuckerberg Calling Morons on The Facebook

Anyone who has used The Facebook in the past month or so is likely to have found themselves being friends with at least one Dumb Facebook User who has posted the viral chain post about Mark Zuckerberg giving away some of his Facebook stock to some lucky ‘winners’.

If you aren’t sure what the hell we’re talking about then we’ve been kind enough to grab a copy for you to assault your eyes with now.

Viral Facebook Post
Viral Facebook Post

The post implies that Mark Zuckerberg himself is looking to give away ‘4.5 million of his Facebook stock’.  He’s even going to be kind enough to stay up until midnight to do it.  What a guy!

It also says that he is going to give a whopping 10% of the stock away to regular joes like us.. Amazing!  Who exactly hes giving the other 90% to isn’t mentioned but who cares, we could own a fraction of a single share just by copying and pasting this bullshit.. We’re in!

In case there was any doubt over the validity of the deal its backed up by saying that it was featured on Good Morning America.  As Australians who can’t verify this we were a little skeptical.  Good Morning America is no but we’ll just have to take their word for it.

By the time you read this will have posted the message to our The Facebook wall too.  While we are waiting for midnight to hit we decided to ask our chief resident economist to calculate our win-fall.  He told us to grow up, so we’ll take a crack at it ourselves and try and break it down so even those who post this crap can understand.

At the time of writing, The Facebook shares are currently trading at $104.66.

Facebook Share Price

Here comes the tricky bit.  Ten percent of 4.5 million shares is 450,000 shares.  450,000 shares times $104.66 then gives us a total value of $47,097,000.  WOW! That’s a lot of coconuts!

Now, assuming that every single user of The Facebook shares or likes this post – and why wouldn’t they with a deal this sweet – we’ll now divvy it up amongst The Facebooks 1,550,000,000 (1.55 Billion) users.

Okay, these are big numbers but lets see what happens when we throw them about in Google Calculator..

Google Calculator
Google Calculator


FUCK YES!!  Everyone gets 3 cents each.


You Get 3 Cents
You Get 3 Cents


UPDATE:  It worked!!! On the stroke of midnight, Mark Zuckerberg sent us a message asking for our bank details for his database.  Then he wired us our 3 cents, though he wouldn’t round it up the tight ass.   He also mentioned that he’ll only be giving the rest of his fortune to people who have liked and shared on The Facebook.

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